Feedback: First Draft

Class Simple Draft Feedback

My peers commented on this version of my magazine

They said that they liked the simplicity of the project and that the black and white and blue colour scheme worked well as it was eye catching and was effective to the reader. Also, on the cover page it was recommended that I made the 'IF' bigger than the 'MAGAZINE' section to make it seem more important and adding more emphasis to the title. They also said that they liked the font which I used throughout as it makes it more of a logo and therefore something which the reader will be able to relate to easily, however they said that on the contents page the word 'CONTENTS' was a bit big and took the readers attention away from the rest of the things on the page. They also thought that there was a lot of white space which detracted attention away from the text is the most important thing. The front page looked good in their opinion and they thought that the main image was good and eye catching. One peer said that the lighting looked deliberate coming through the window and that it reflected the folk genre well and another said that the font which I have used is clear for the reader to read. One thing which they said was that the barcode was a bit too big and is a distraction on the page which I agree with. They thought that the double page spread was layed out well and that it was spaced clearly so it was easy for the reader to read and understand. They thought that the font I used stands out well, however they thought that I should experiment with the colour of the header.

Class Colour Draft Feedback

My peers also commented on this version of my magazine

They said that they liked the overall 'natural' style of the magazine and said that the model suited the genre well because of her appearance and her relaxed style. They also said that the colour scheme linked well to the genre and style which I was going for in my magazine. On the cover, comments were been made about the colours of the text which gets lost within the image which I agree with so I know that I need to change the layout and colours of the cover. On the contents page they said that the models pose looked really similar to the pose she was in on the front cover. Another person said that the record in the corner looks like the play/pause buttons in the corner of 'The Fly' magazine which looked really good and interesting however there is too much going on making it diffocult to focus on on thing because it is so busy. The double page spread got the same comments regarding the models pose as it doesn't vary much and the same with the facial expression. However they did like the use of black text on white background as it makes it really clear for the reader to read the article. Also, they liked how the title overlaps onto both pages and that it looked good overall, they believed that the images would look more authentic if the model had a prop such as a guitar.

Questionnaire

I made a questionnaire for other people aside from my class mates to answer about my magazine so that I could get their opinions about what is good on the magazine and what I need to change to make it better.

1. Do you like the title of the magazine? Explain why:

Yes as it is short and catchy

Yes but you should add emphasis to the name (remove indie folk magazine from underneath the 'IF')

Yes as it looks and sounds professional

Yes because it is short, cathcy and professional

Yes as it looks professional and similar to other magazine titles

2. Do they like the image used on the cover? Explain why:

Yes, could be clearer but it is artistic and makes the model look good

Yes the model looks good but it is a bit grainy. A better quality image would improve the whole page and look of the magazine cover

Yes it is bright and eye catching

Yes but it is slightly unclear, however the model looks really good

Yes as it links well to the genre

3. Do you like the cover layout?

Yes because most colours work but the grey on the title is a bit boring

Yes but the eye isn't drawn to the artist, instead it is drawn to the font on the right which is ytoo big and doesn't stand out as it blends into the image. The barcode is also a bit too big and need to get rid of the 'indie folk magazine' as the repetition of the word magazine is a bit strange. A lot of the writing is a bit 'word processed' for the genre you are going for

It is good but some of the writing is difficult to read because of the image placement

Yes however some of the colours don't stand out because of the image placement

Yes because the title is in the right place which looks professional and the colours refelct the style you have gone for however some of the text is difficult to read becaise of the size and colour of the image. Also there is no date or issue number.

4. What would you change? Explain why:

Alter the colour and the font of the information on the left so that it stands out more

Font and colour- too many fonts and too many different font colours to make it easy for the reader to read. Brighter colours would make it stand out more in the shops

Colour of some of the text for clarity

The big barcode doesn't look too great and too many fonts and boring colours. If it was brighter it would be more appealing to the reader. Also a smoother font to make it not look too 'word processd' as it si a bit blocky, funky and techno-ey for the genre you are going for. Add emphasis to the 'CHLOE' bit of text and make everything punchier to avoid full sentences. The quote could be used as a strap line at the top or bottom of the page which would look really good

The writing down the side is the worng colours- make it brighter or move the image so that it is easier to read.

5. Do you like the contents layout? Explain why:

Yes it works well, however it is quite busy and it is hard to focus on one thing as it looks quite listy

It is a bit busy and the block font doesn't go with the genre. It is possibly a bit too listy and the dark blue isn't very reflective of your genre

Yes the idea is good. Quite busy but the highlighted text make it clear to read

Yes, a creative way of doing a contents page

Yes, very eye catching. The colour scheme is very complimentary however there isn't a clear link to the contents and the cover or double page spread.

6. Do you like the image used on the contents page? Explain why:

Yes because it links to the theme, style and genre and it is at an interesting position on the page. Follows the theme as it links back to the cover

Yes the model looks really good and is at an interesting place on the page

Yes, a bit similar to the image on the cover though and is a bit grainy but the colour is very interesting

Yes, very similar to the one on the cover and it is good that she is on the left. She looks happy which is good. Like the facial expression. A little bit grainy, a better quality would improve the overall page

7. What would you change on the contents page? Explain why:

It is too busy, take some of the list sections off and it is too sentency. If it was a bit more punchy it would be better for the reader. The colour scheme is quite harsh which doesn't link too well to the style and genre of your magazine

The amount of texts on the page making it crowded. The size of the 'IF MAGAZINE' and to make it more vintagey

Could be a bit brighter rather than darker and make it less busy as it is difficult to focus on anything

Really like it because of the list look so nothing, the quality of the image perhaps

8. Do you like the image on the double page spread? Explain why:

Yes because it shows the whole model and has an interesting background. The staircase works because it is a more intimate setting in an interview with just the model

Yes it it wasnt so grainy it would be really good because the background is interesting

Yes the artist looks really pretty

It needs to be better quality but the background works really well on this page

Yes the staircase looks good and the pose/facial expression looks natural and casual and isn't awkward to look at

9. Do you like the layout of the double page spread? Explain why:

Yes, 2 columns looks professional and the image is filling the page and shows the whole setting

Yes the font looks a bit word processed which wasn't the vintage style which you were going for. The colours are good and it looks natural. Having it in 2 columns is good as it reads like a proper article

Yes because it looks professional

Yes there is the perfect amount of white space

It is good but the block writing could have been broken up

a bit, I like the image on the left hand side because it shows the whole image and the setting is good

10. What would you change about the double page spread? Explain why:

Put the questions in bold to show it more clearly as it is more professional

Add more colours to the background so that the theme from previous pages continues and break up the writing so it isn't so harsh to look at

Put the questions into bold for clarity

The title font so that it has a clearer link to the previous pages, make the questions into bold and add a "51" page number. Put about the album at the end of the article

Teacher Feedback

Mr Nicolle

The colours on the cover dont really work as well as they could. Because the colours on the image are fairly dark, they grey text fades into the image and makes it difficult to read. The colour palett overall gives a fairly dark look overall. which could link better to your gebre. Folk tends to be quite an upbeat style of music and the colours used on the cover and thorughout the magazine should reflect that. Also, the title needs to be bigger, magazine is on there twice so getting rid of one of those would be better and making the 'IF' stand out more would be a lot better. Also grey for the title is a big washed out so a brighter colour would be more appropriate. If the name was bigger then the artist could be slightly more to the left which would make the layout seem more professional. Using the quote at the top of the page is good, however it could be made into more of a strap line wither across the top of the bottom of the page making it seem like a logo in the style of Kerrang magazine. The quote would also be better if definitely was spelt correctly! The model you have chosen reflects the genre well because of her natural look (make up, hair, etc) however the costume could link to it slightly better. Re-photographing in a better oufit that links more appropriately to the genre would be better. Also, the image quality isn't very good and so using a better camera would mean that the magazine would look more professional overall. You wanted to take photographs outside however I think that for the cover they should be taken against the white background at school as it would make it seem more authentic. On the cover the text is too sentency. In order to make it seem more like a real magazine the text used needs to be more punchy to have more of an impact on the reader when they first look at the magazine. Also, the magazine is focused mainly on the artis so need to make the artist seem to be the main feature on the cover either done by removing or decreasing the size of the other text or making the artists name bigger and brighter than everythig else on the page except from the name of the magazine. The text beneath the magazine name fades into the image which is down to the size of the text and the image placement. The colour scheme needs to change slightly and needs to include brighter colours which would mean that it would stand out and be clearer to read. The images could be better. The staircase works on the double page spread because the interview is fairly intimate and so that setting really works. On the cover and contents I think a better place to take the pictures would be infront of the whote screen so that more focus is on the artist rather than the setting. Practice taking some images outside as well as in front if the screen to see which is better and then go with that. A variety in poses and facial expressions would also be better and props would be good as it would make it look more authentic. Also the barcode and various bits of text are too big, making it smaller would improve the overall look of the magazine. On the contents page, again the image of the staircase doesn't link brilliantly and I think the reason for using the dark coloured block text was to cover up the image. Also, although it is good to use a colour for the block text as it makes it more interesting to look at and more entertaining for the reader to read, the dark navy is really quite harsh and doesnt link with the genre very well. Also, using the list format on the contents makes it quite formal which is exaggerated by the use of full sentences. This needs to be more punchy, however the font which is used is clear to read which is good. There is a lot of text on the contents one after the other is really busy and makes it hard for the reader to focus on one thing on the page. Also, the feature artist hasn't been made to look like a feature as the information about them is in the same font as the othe rtext and the size is the same. The word 'CONTENTS' at the top of the page could be bigger and would have more impact on the reader. The colours used don't have a big link to the cover however it is brighter and more eye catching to the reader. The dark blue is harsh and doesn't reflect the genre too well however it is good to have colour. The 'IF magazine' text at the top of the page could be moved to the bottom so it would stand out and the font is the same on the cover giving good continuity. On the double page spread the black on white works well and the title in one line across two pages looks good. The oramge/pink colour doesn't really link to the cover and contents but works well on the double page spread. The image using the staircase works because of the intimate environment and it is all about her, however the image quality needs to be improved. Adding more page numbers would look better and more professional rather than going up in twos. Overall it is good but to get a top mark improvements need to be made.


Mr Ford

Feedback from Mr Ford showed what things I needed to change in order to make the product better. Things such as:

Cover

• Spelling mistakes
• Changing colours
• Removing text
• Better quality images
• Changing fonts

Contents

• Making it less busy
• Poor quality images
• Changing font sizes
• Moving text

Double Page Spread

 

• Font
• Font sizes
• Font colurs
• Poor quality image
• Bold for questions